Correction

I just wanted to point out a mixup that i recently made. My last post was said to be a guide to success. However, the word "success" was a typo. It is actually a guide to completely fucking everything up. Sorry guys...

Once again, it's a guide for complete FAILURE... not success...

Sorry for any inconvenience.

College

Many people come up to me, wondering how i've achieved so much success during my freshman year. So upon request, i've assembled this five step guide to excellence as you matriculate through the duration of your undergraduate experience.

1. Every single door that you see, you must kick in.

2. Every single opportunity that you have to consume alcohol, you must seize it.

3. Every single member of the opposite sex, you must hit on.

4. Every single one of your professors of the opposite sex, you must hit on.

5. Every single class must be skipped at least once a week.